Your Inner Child

6 Dec

My session with the medical counsellor yesterday went up one higher level when we spoke about the fears, anxieties and negativity that comes after treatment.

I did not understand why after handling cancer treatment very well, I found it difficult to proceed in life, to live my dreams and future life with an optimism that is often seen in cancer survivors. One month ago, I realised that it could be menopausal symptoms which bordered on depression. Yesterday, my counsellor said it could be possible that the fears and anxieties were within me all along. Because I had a focus (to get treatment and get better), I have subconsciously pushed these feelings aside. And now it’s pay-back time.

After discussing my fears with her, it seems that there is an inner critic within me who is harsh and pretty much judges me according to all the mistakes that I’ve made. In fact, because of this judge, I have fears of failure because I fear that she will judge me. It all sounds a little psychotic, like I have different personalities within me but I honestly understand it as it is really true that I have such a judgemental voice in my head! We then went on to identify the different voices in my head, breaking down the inner conversations within my head. Then we proceeded to come up with things to tell those voices when they are at work. One of the things which we discovered was that I am often too hard on myself and I need to have a kind voice to myself.

I did a little research after I came home about “inner child” and came across this on the livestrong website. It is a little introduction on the concept of the inner child and is a good place to start, if you think you may have an inner child who has been suppressed.

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